It's like someone finally turned on the lights...

I know...it's been a while since I last blogged.  Life has been BUSY - and I was obviously missing inspirational writing opportunities by losing focus on the chaos of everyday.  But - here's my latest mental ramblings - it's an emotional week for me - getting ready for another half marathon... I am determined to hit my goal of under 2 hours.

So... in reflecting over the past year, assessing where I can make changes to hit my goal, recognizing my weaknesses, and overall getting my head ready for this race... I am amazed by the fact that I am about to run my 6th race in 5 months... 4th Half Marathon in 5 months! If you would have told me a year ago that I would do these things... I would have laughed. 

The person I am today - is soo far from what I used to be... a friend put it best - she said "It's like someone finally turned on the light in you..."  Okay...now the emotional part - think about that... night and day difference in the person people see me as...  Did I really live life in the dark?

YES! When I look at the life I live now, the experiences, the relationships, how I feel about myself - I feel like my past was dark - pitch black.  Why? Well - wouldn't I make a fortune if I knew an answer that could change everyone's lives...

Here's my answer - what it was for me - and it all starts with a lack of self-confidence.  A lack of self-confidence caused a life with guilt, unrealistic expectations of perfection (yep...that's me...), fear of change, fear of making mistakes, fear that others wouldn't like me...  In all of that - I lived a life that wasn't mine...

"Don't wait until everything is just right.  It will never be perfect.  There will always be challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions.  So what.  Get started now.  With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident and more and more successful."

So - now the light has been turned on - I can see the world and opportunities that exist.  But I can also see myself.  But that's a topic for another blog - rediscovering the person that was there the whole time...
I'm glad I have new sunglasses to see this bright and shining world! So... Rock 'n Roll Dallas - watch out - this girl is ready to run!

"Self-confidence is knowing that we have the capacity to do something good
and firmly decide not to give up."  Dalai Lama